Gimme Less

I just saw Britney’s performance on the VMAs. Normally I wouldn’t care, but you never know what this train will be leaving the tracks, so you have to pay attention if you want to see it wreck.

The name of the song is “Gimme More”. I think she wrote it about cheesecake.

Beer Drinking Terrorists On The Run

Yet another story that would be hilarious if it wasn’t true by way of TheLibertyPapers–this one about a group of hashers (runners/beer drinkers) who were suspected of terrorism after mapping out a course using colored flour in an IKEA parking lot. The full story on these felons was posted on MSNBC. Jack Bauer would be proud of this great example of government at its best.

Mayoral spokeswoman Jessica Mayorga said the city plans to seek restitution from the Salchows, who are due in court Sept. 14.

“You see powder connected by arrows and chalk, you never know,” she said. “It could be a terrorist, it could be something more serious. We’re thankful it wasn’t, but there were a lot of resources that went into figuring that out.”

That’s a great policy. Any time you see something even remotely odd, go ahead and assume that it is a terrorist at work and evacuate the entire area immediately. If you’re wrong (or, ahem, just ignorant), it is pretty safe to assume that someone else is responsible and should pay.

PacMan Jones is a Wrassler!

The Tennessean dropped that bomb today.

I hate to say it, but this worries me. Professional wrestlers have a hard enough time staying out of trouble and living clean lives without throwing in bad seeds like PacMan Jones.

Why stop there? If TNA is going to stoop this low they might as well send Barry Bonds down to ringside to be his manager carrying a Louisville Slugger. They’ve lost all legitimacy.

Blogger’s Union

As nuts as it may sound, some are trying to do it. Michael Silence has this to say:

In a move that might make some people scratch their heads, a loosely formed coalition of left-leaning bloggers are trying to band together to form a labor union they hope will help them receive health insurance, conduct collective bargaining or even set professional standards.

This is actually the first union I’ve ever heard of that I think is a good idea. Maybe by forming and joining this inevitable disaster, these left-leaning bloggers will realize what a ridiculous idea it is. It may be the only way they ever get it through their thick skulls.

Then again, that didn’t really work with liberal talk radio did it? Instead of realizing that their product didn’t appeal to the market, they instead tried to blame the market for not desiring their product.

I thought of other benefits…

Based on the tendency of unions to discourage actual work, the end result will be that they will blog less. Everybody wins!

Think about it, no blogging on weekends, holidays, or after hours. Not to mention the frequent and extended breaks they will take while actually “working”. This idea sounds better and better the more I think about it.

Fairness on Talk Radio

Diane Feinstein is “looking at” pushing the fairness doctrine for talk radio broad casters in the United States. The conversation was brought about mostly by the public outcry over the proposed immigration bill that has been getting slammed on talk radio, which is by and large right leaning.

For the record, I’m hardly a fan of Limbaugh, and Sean Hannity is an even bigger self-promoting jackass that Rush is in my opinion. Savage is a nut, but entertaining. Neil Boortz is the only one of these guys I can listen to for more than an hour or so. Nevertheless, what isn’t fair about the current state of talk radio? These guys put out a product, people listen, advertisers buy ads to reach these people.

In contrast, the left started a radio station, no one listened, no one bought ads, they embezzled money from at least one charity to keep it going, still no one listened, they didn’t pay their “talent”, their talent quit, and they folded.

By the way, isn’t it funny that “spreading the message” isn’t so important when you aren’t getting a paycheck? I’m a little disappointed that Al Franken wasn’t willing to stay on the air for what he believed is right, not just for the money. Hell, even Coolio said that if hip hop didn’t pay he’d rap for free–that’s real commitment to your cause.

It seems pretty cut and dry. If someone wants to make things “fair”, they can sink millions more dollars into a leftist radio station that folks who drive to work and back and are out all day on sales calls–the people they propose stealing from–will continue not to listen.

That sounds fair to me.

Cameron Diaz Apologizes for Maoist Bag

From, Cameron Diaz’s publicist is apparently on top of the situation, and she has released an official apology for Baggygate.

I did not realize the potentially hurtful nature of the slogan printed on it.

I suspect she’ll be entering rehab once she returns to the U.S. This is exactly why these morons should just keep their mouths shut about politics, social issues, etc. Just read the freaking lines the way you are told. DANCE MONKEY!!! You’re not paid millions of dollars per film to try to explain something you didn’t pay attention to in high school.

Ron Paul on Morton Downey Jr.

Saw this posted at Reason and had to put it up here too, it’s just too funny.

Ron Paul is so young in this clip (1988). I’d love to see him this energetic and rowdy in the Republican debates. However, legalization of drugs would not go well with that crowd. They are probably happy this has surfaced on the web to use it as what they think will be ammo against him. It may actually garner him more support.

By the way, “d” had a great comment on the Reason post

Quick! Post the marines at that kid’s mouth to keep the cheeseburgers out!

[youtube 88REf0tjZHo]

What is America Really Full Of?

Q. What do you get when you mix illegal immigration, the Tom Tancredo cheerleading squad, and a really disturbing description of a little girl’s funeral as overseen by Jehovah’s Witnesses?

A. One of the funniest, and in some ways scariest, posts I’ve read in a long time.

It seems that America, much like heaven, is believed to be full by some people. Becky C., however takes issue with this assertion:

I’m not sure it is actually full.

But, there are way too many assholes.

Read it all.

Newsflash–High School Kids in a Fight!

Is anyone else bored/disgusted/irritated/dumbstruck by news (and I use that term lightly) stations like Fox and CNN spending hours covering important stories like kids posting fights on YouTube?

I just went to warm up my lunch and there were 20 people in our dining area fixated on a story on Fox about a “savage beating” that was videotaped and posted on YouTube. Of course, the anchors were telling us how horrible this is, and of course you couldn’t see them, only hear their voices over the video of the horrible fight that YouTube is showing.

So there were at least 20 people watching this fight on the “news” who never would have watched it otherwise. These news stations are just a pathetic joke.

My Audition as Lindsay Lohan’s Publicist

“The substance police allegedly found in my client’s car was not on the person of my client and was allegedly in the possession of one of the vehicle’s passengers.  My client was not aware that this person possessed alleged illegal substances.   Allegedly leaving the accident was an lapse in judgment, and my client wishes to apologize to her friends and family for any alleged embarrassment she may have caused them.  The important thing is that no one was seriously injured by her allegedly uncharacteristically poor decision.  My client and her family are exploring her options to receive the best possible medical care to help remedy her alleged condition, and we appreciate the public’s support during this trying time.”