A Car, A Washer/Dryer, and Air Conditioning

No, this isn’t a Johnny Carson Carnac skit.  And yes, I’m old enough to remember Carnac, even though I didn’t get it.

These are the first three items that are considered to be necessities by Pew Research Center.

You know what that means–it’s just a matter of time before everyone has a “right” to these things.

And once something is a right, of course, we can get it from the gov’ment.

For “free”.

HT Reason Hit & Run

Best Part of the Olympics So Far…

Bela Karolyi

This guy is fired up and candid. I love watching Bob Costas throw out a chum of a question and seeing Bela Karolyi attack. I heard today that there are rumors he has been banned from the gymnastics arena in Beijing. I’m not sure if that’s true–it may be that he’s happy sit in the studio with Costas sipping lemonade and cashing fat checks–but if it is true, the viewing public is the real winner.

Outspoken guys with accents and bad tempers always make for great TV.

And who cares how old a competitor is? If the goal is to find out who is best, age shouldn’t matter.

BaDoop BaDooping The Olympics

“Badoop Badoop it!”

That’s heard commonly at our house if the television is on. It’s code for using the fast forward feature on the DVR. Ours doesn’t make that sound, but the TiVo does, and it’s more fun to say than “fast forward”.

I can’t wait to badoob badoop the Olympics. Why? Because if I badoop badoop everything but the actual sports, it will only take me 15-20 minutes a day to see everything. That’s because coverage of the Olympics isn’t very sports centric lately. Now it’s all about human interest–13 minute profiles of athletes that highlight the sacrifices they’ve made and the obstacles they’ve overcome.

Note to NBC–Every Olympic athlete has sacrificed and overcome obstacles to get there. That’s one of the things that separates them from the people who are almost Olympic athletes.

The reason we watch sporting events is for their inherent drama. These events have a way of creating drama all on their own. When Jim Nance tries to force it down my throat that this is a dramatic event because someone didn’t skip swim practice on the day their dog was being neutered or overcame their fear of crowds to run the 100m in a large stadium, it just waters it all down.

If you want to do some human profile type stuff during these Olympics, how about doing a story on someone being oppressed and abused by the Chinese government?

But then I guess those stories are a dime a dozen too.

Me Fit? Maybe Not. How About Wii Fit?

So the other night I was watching Chelsea Handler and she had Tina Yothers on. You know, the girl from Family Ties who wasn’t Mallory? Anyway, she was pretty hard core about being on Celebrity Fit Club, and seemed like a pretty cool woman, so the next time I saw Celebrity Fit Club was on I watched about 10 minutes of it.

Still with me? Ok, during the commercial break there was a commercial for the Wii Fit featuring Tina Yothers working out. I sort of assumed that the Wii Fit or something like it already existed, but the commercial said it was coming soon. I went over the Amazon to check out this video for the Wii, which isn’t quite as cool as the Tina Yothers commercial, mostly because Tina Yothers isn’t in it.

I watched the long version of the video, and I gotta tell you…I can’t see anyone getting fit with this thing for a few reasons. I can see where it’s better than just hanging out on the couch, but I don’t see it getting anyone truly fit.

The “heavy bag” is just punching the air. If you’ve ever spent any quality time with a heavy bag you know exactly why it wears you down–because it’s heavy. I don’t have the exact numbers, but the density of air probably isn’t anything close to the density of a heavy bag. How is this different from the regular Wii boxing game?

Then there’s the strength training program that has you doing push-ups and torso twists. Again, better than nothing, but do you need a trainer for this? And jogging in place? Really? The balance games looked pretty fun, but I don’t see how you can practice balance without actually having to balance. I mean, without actually feeling gravity, they’re more like leaning games than balance games.

I guess I’m saying that there’s no way I’d buy this game. Then again, I don’t even have a Wii.

Write It All Off

Cosmo KramerKramer: They just write it off.

Jerry: You don’t even know what a write off is, do you?

Kramer: Do you?

Jerry: No, I don’t.

Kramer. Well they do, and they’re the ones writing it off.

Jerry: I wish I had the last 20 seconds of my life back.

HT to Auramae via Twitter for this article on Wired. When you’re making a living blogging about your personal life, can you write off personal expenses like condoms? That’s what Soccergirl is attempting to do, and I for one am all for it.

In an age when bloggers and podcasters are making a living — or trying to — by blogging and podcasting about their personal lives, what exactly is legitimate? And if writing off your personal life is as easy as writing about it online and getting some Google ads, why doesn’t everybody do it?

Well, it turns out that you can’t write off things that you buy if you’re using them primarily for personal use, which makes sense. But just for laughs, I thought about all of the things I could write off since I’ve been blogging:

Cable TV (lots of blogging about The Wire, Lost, and Rock of Love), internet access (obviously), gas to drive around town, running shoes, and my taxes themselves.

WWE Does Something Really Classy

Ric Flair

I’ve pretty much stopped watching wrasslin’, mostly due to the great Hornswaggle debacle of 2007. But I tuned in tonight to find out what happened at Wrestlemania. I was surprised to find out that Ric Flair was retiring. Just an angle? I thought so, but now I don’t.

At the end of the show, Flair gave his retirement speech, which was basically a thank you to the fans. Then HHH came out and thanked Flair and introduced a bunch of other guys who wanted to say thanks as well–guys I haven’t seen in a long time–The Four Horsemen, including Arn Anderson, JJ Dillon, Dean Milenko, Tully Blanchard, and Barry Windham. Lots of other old school wrestlers too–Ricky Steamboat, Greg Valentine, and Harley Race. Then some prominent guys who are currently wrestling and are close to Flair personally came out, then the whole cast came out.

Flair was crying, and everyone in the arena was chanting, “Thank you Ric!” A very nice way to pay tribute to a guy who IS professional wrestling, at least to people of my generation.

Whooo!

By the way, noticeably absent? Vincent K. McMahon.

5 Reasons Bret Michaels is the Lamest “Rock Star” Ever

I remember when Poison was really popular and I thought they were stupid. Mostly it was because I was a music snob back then, but a lot of it had to do with the fact that they just sucked.

Now we have Rock Of Love, and honestly, I can think of 5 people I know right now who are happily married with kids and regular ol’ jobs who act more like rock stars than Bret Michaels. I had Easter dinner with one of them (and our wives and kids) today, after he got out of church of course. I think we drank enough beer between the two of us–it had to have been 2/3 of a six pack–to put Bret Michaels under the table.

I wouldn’t let this guy be a roadie for a boy band–that’s how NOT Rock Star he is. I submit these five facts for your consideration.

1. He has no game. None.

You would think that after having girls throw themselves at him for a few years in the 80s, he would at least have a little bit of game. This guy couldn’t close the deal with a drunk hooker if he had crapped crack and pissed liquid gold. Want to see a rock star with game? Give me (of course) David Lee Roth.

2. No famous chicks want to date him

Bret Michaels is was actually attractive and famous. And he has to go on TV to get a date? Yeah he dated Pam Anderson (briefly) a long time ago. But my guess is she quickly figured out how lame he is (see reason #1). Even the girl he picked in the first season of Rock of Love didn’t want to date him, presumably because she was already too famous for him. Let me have Rick Ocasek, Billie Joel, Adam Clayton, Kid Rock or instead of this Z-list supporter.

3. He took the girls’ exes to Dave and Busters.

Not a trip into and out of Vegas for a weekend on a private jet. Not a run to Tijuana to get tats and piercings. Not even a strip club. Dave and Freaking Busters. Give me a break. Nothing says ROCK STAR like sipping on a Zima and playing a few rounds of skee-ball and wak-a-mole, huh? Instead, I’d like to see Lemmy from Motorhead. Yeah, he’s not going to go anywhere uber-cool either, but he’ll show up with a cooler full of beer and keep you up all night telling funny stories and burning you with cigarettes when he catches you nodding off. That’s cool.

4. He’s never fought a member of Motley Crue

As far as I know, he hasn’t fought anybody. Not that I’m surprised by that–I’m sure he’d get his ass kicked. But he’s never even shown that he has a temper. I’ve never heard stories of dressing rooms being trashed. I’ve never heard of him being thrown out of a club for breaking a beer bottle across someone’s face. Nothing. I’d so much rather watch this show with Tommy Lee, who I bet has fought EVERY member of Motley Crue at one time or another.

5. He’s never been to rehab

That’s actually admirable for people like me and you. But this is America. We like our rock stars either troubled, violent, or toxic–preferably all three. He’s never even been drunk on his own “party like a rock star” TV show. I have a feeling that “Bret’s Brew” is actually 30% lemonade, 30% fruit punch, 30% Sprite and 10% soda water. Give me Bret’s old guitar player, C.C. DeVille in his place. At least there’s a chance he’ll go on a coke binge and freak out right in front of our eyes.

Jitterbug Cell Phone For Older People…Seriously?

I get the fact that there is a big demographic of seniors that may not be reached by the majority of mobile phone services. But I don’t think this commercial sends that message. To me, this is borderline insulting to older people. Watch it first, and let me know what impression it makes on you.

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OK, to me this commercial says:

We understand the needs of older people, and we’re doing something about it. Our phone has big numbers, since you’ve probably never used any touch tone phone and can’t count to ten. We don’t expect you to have that complicated keypad layout memorized.

And sure, you can control the volume on any other phone, but that’s complicated. This phone has one setting–LOUD. That will make it seem more natural when you yell back into it.

Besides that, old people are too stupid to figure out something as complicated as a cell phone. You’ll need us to help you save names and numbers into the phone, because there’s no way you’d ever think of something as clever as writing them down instead.

Not my words, mind you, just what this commercial says to me. Was this made by SNL? It reminds me of the “DVDs My Wife Made” digital short from a couple of weeks ago.

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A Great Story Opportunity

A while back, I wrote a post about a few advantages newspapers have in the market and how they could use them to remain relevant. Using these assets–excellent writing, investigative journalism, and local marketplace branding–newspapers can give us something no one else can.

Today in the KNS, at least on their web site, there is a relatively short piece from the AP about a man who escaped prison 46 years ago and has been apprehended. This is the exact type of story I’d love to see local newspapers tackle. It’s the perfect opportunity for them to give me something no one else can give me.

Leroy Albert Morgan’s crimes occurred in Hamilton County, he escaped from a Nashville prison, and he was caught in East Tennessee, so it is of local interest. Using great writing and investigative journalism, why not tell us this story? Take us beyond, “he escaped in 1961, he’s been using an alias, and he was arrested this week.”

Tell us the story.

How did he escape prison, and how was he able to avoid authorities for so long? Has he been in Tennessee the entire time? Was he assisted by friends and family–how many people were in on it? What has he done in the time since the escape? What did the State do immediately following the escape to try to catch him, and why did these efforts fail? What (exactly) have they done since? How did they eventually track him down, how long did it take to find him, and how long have they known his whereabouts?

Seriously…this is the stuff movies (or at least made for TV movies) are made of. A good great writer can do some investigative journalism and tell us a great story from so many angles–the escapee, his friends and family, the penal system. And again, most bloggers don’t have the time and resources available to cover something like this.